I have been amazingly unsuccessful in my life, at times.  I have miserably failed over and over again. I have been to that point where I can’t get out of bed.

Yet, I have reached the goals I have set for my life.  How can this be?

How you deal with failure and rejection is key to how successful and happy you are.

Bouncing back from failure is a key skill you have to learn to be successful.

A recent University study found that adopting an attitude of “realistic optimism,” which combines the positive outlook of optimists with the critical thinking of pessimists, can boost happiness and resilience.

Here are the steps that are key for me to bounce back from failure.

  1. Change my environment by going on vacation or just going to a park.
  2. Start gaining small victories.
  3. Ask meaningful questions about why I want to have what I failed to get.
  4. Spend time being grateful for the people and things that I do have.

Because of built-in survival mechanisms, our brains are naturally wired to pay more attention to negative events than positive ones. But in reality, we experience positive events with much greater frequency. One key to building resiliency lies in noticing and appreciating those positive experiences whenever and wherever they occur.

What matters most is your positivity ratio. That ratio is a product of how you characterize the balance of positive and negative experiences in your daily life. At minimum, we need a 3-to-1 ratio of positive to negative experiences not just to build resilience, but also to thrive, be optimally productive and enjoy our lives. – Source Barbara Fredrickson, PhD

When you become a grateful person, you will see that every failure is important. Each one moves you closer to what you want.